Tuesday, September 14, 2010

I've Returned

... and with a VENGEANCE!
thank you for all the lovely comments on my last blog. I took a little hiatus for a week. I didn't even attempt to participate in Fitblog Chat, or my Drop Dead Gorgeous by December challenge either. I was feeling pretty darn defeated, and needed a little time to wallow in it. Of course I'm sure this resulted in a weight gain ... but I've got no one to blame but myself!

In other news - The Fiance took our daughter for the weekend to his parent's house. Which means I had THE WHOLE WEEKEND to myself! It was a-mazing. I missed them both terribly, but it really allowed me to think about what I need to do for myself and if I'm truly committed to losing the weight. Am i? yes. Is it going to be a hard road? I wouldn't have it any other way.

With my new attitude in hand, I've decided to finally post my "before" pictures, along with some other pictures from over the years of my weight fluctuations. This is really hard for me, because I'm trying to move past the whole "holy crap I look like a beached whale" view of myself. Sometimes taking pictures makes that worse. Why is  it that I always look different in the mirror than in pictures? Does anyone else notice that? At any rate - I never want to see 310 again. That was my highest weight and I'm never looking back. I can't wait until a few months from now when I look back at this entry and feel accomplished and proud of the work I've done. okay, Emily, shut your mouth - picture time!

This picture was me at my previous HW (highest weight) ever. 275lbs. I hate hate hate this picture. You cal tell that I was literally bursting out of my size 20 jeans.

 The picture to the right is where I always plateau in my weight loss struggles. This is about 245lbs and where I've spent the majority of my adult life at. I actually like this picture of me, but of course - it's a head shot ;)

My skinniest time to date, at 220lbs. Ironically, this was a time I was never taking pictures of myself. I think at that time I still felt like I hadn't come very far and didn't want my picture taken. I can tell now just by looking at my face/neck that I was quite a bit lighter!

The guy to my left is my brother - one of my very best friends and constant support system!

Okay, now what you've waited for - my pictures from NOW. I'm weighing in around 285lbs these days (something I'm definitely not proud of, but am accepting.) I took these two days ago in my bathroom, so they aren't the BEST quality - but they'll do! *sigh*

I'm immediately regretting this post. But hopefully it will inspire some of you to take pictures. It really does show your progress the best! 

I'm not going to list all the things I hate about myself in these pictures. I'm only focusing on moving forward.

Tell me:
How do you document your progress?
How often do you measure/take pictures?

Tune in next time : 101 goals in 1001 days (Blog Trend!)


  1. The first time I tried to lose weight I took a lot pictures. It was great to see the change in my body. This time around it's taking a lot more time and I haven't gotten to see much of a change yet. I often look back at the photos of me at my smallest weight and feel bad about myself for gaining weight again, so I've decided not to do it anymore.

    Thank you for posting these pictures and not bashing yourself. Just remember, you're beautiful, no matter what the scale says.

  2. That zebra top is pretty amazing! Where'd you get it?

    I haven't measured or taken pictures..I really need to! I just go by weight.

    Don't regret this post. I know it's scary to put yourself out there, but man..you are really beautiful! At every weight you posted.

  3. Good for you! You should feel proud for posting pics of yourself. It's so hard to put yourself out there. I hope you get only positive feed back.

  4. I completely relate to never looking the same in pictures as I view myself. I usually have to take about 10 pictures before I take 1 that I am OK with. And I too usually only take head shots so you can see my body. :) I usually try to take picture twice a month around my weigh in day. I document my progress in my blog and in pictures posted on Facebook. I have a lot of friends and family out of NY state and this is a way they can see my progress too. :)

  5. I'm a sucker for anything zebra. :)

    I take pictures at the start of every month. I only have 2 sets of pics so far, but I was really surprised to see the differences. I keep meaning to actually take my measurements, but haven't gotten around to it quite yet.

  6. Wow, you guys! Thank you for the motivating comments. I truly appriciate your feedback and taking the time to say hi!

    @ A Girl Who Loves Cupcakes : I'm so glad you relate to what I'm doing! I too look at pictures of my "skinny" self (and by that I mean slightly LESS obese ;) and give myself a hard time. We gotta stop thinking so badly about ourselves, right?! I'm excited to check out your blog.

    @ April : thanks for the compliment on the top! It's actually from my home business! I do UndercoverWear home parties for some extra cash. I love that they have up to 3x in lingerie/pjs. Hard to find! If you ever want to order somthing I can give you a discount (PLEASE don't think i'm trying to push my business on you .. just sharing the info, lol) And thank you for the super nice comment - you are beautiful too!

    @ Jessica : it IS really hard putting yourself out there! Thanks for the positive feedback - I'll work on the proud part ;)

    @ Martha : I think you're amazing for sharing your progress and journey with friends and family. Only my very best friend knows about my blog (well, and all you lovely readers) but I'm still a bit embarssed let my family/friends in on it.

    @ Shannon : I like your idea of once a month pictures! I was trying to decide what would be a good time to wait until the next one. I hope I can see some surprising results like you did!

    I know I keep saying this, but thanks everyone :) I love my readers <3

  7. Back before this last baby (I just had him 4 weeks ago) I was taking pictures once a month. They were very motivating, especially when the scale didn't seem to reflect what I thought it should, or especially on days when I just felt fatter than before. I sat down and looked at pictures taken of me, and was pleasantly surprised! Now, after baby (during the pregnancy I gained 52 pounds, plus about 20 pounds back right before pregnancy). So now I am even further from my goal than before. I usually refuse to let people take my picture, especially a full body pic. I have been meaning to get it done, but something keeps holding me back. I should just do it, especially since I seem to have lost all the "baby" weight that comes off right away. It wasn't even half of what I had gained :( I love reading your blog! Don't regret this post, it's very inspiring!

  8. I haven't taken any pictures to document my progress. I do, however, take my measurements weekly. I think it's a great motivator. At the clinic where i weigh-in and get my foods for the Ideal Protein plan that i'm on. They do my measurements every week- arms, chest, hips, waist, thigh, and they check my blood pressure. For those weeks when i may gain weight or only lose a little bit, i normally lose inches, and it really motivates and i don't lose all hope in this process and journey.

  9. Hi - I just happened across your blog... I think you are awesome for posting these pictures of yourself! Good for you and good luck! p.s. I also hate how different I look in pictures and the mirror. I feel like I don't really know what I look like. Frustrating.

  10. @ Emily - congrats on your baby! My little one in 3.5 months. The time goes by SO fast. Thank you for posting a comment, and if you EVER need someone to vent to, brag to, TALK to, I'm here! I had a rough first month after Harper was born. We're both gonna lose this "baby weight" and THEN some :)

    @ Brittany - good idea on measuring. That's definitely something I would like to start doing! I'm sure sometimes when a gain shows on the scale, your measurements may show otherwise!

    @ Nicole - THANK YOU for stopping by! I'm just starting out this blog, and I'm so grateful for readers. What is WITH the whole "looking different in pictures" thing? It totally shoots my self-esteem out the widow some days!


Thank you for taking the time to comment - I'll try to respond in a timely fashion!